Miami’s possession? More like PowerPoint bingo. Palmeiras’ defense? Aged socks with Wi-Fi. Porto’s 3-4-2-1 is elegant… until the striker runs out of beer and into your analytics. Rio Negro didn’t carry history — they invented it during halftime while debating GDPR compliance over a nachos. So… who actually passed the ball? Or was it just the pub’s Wi-Fi password? 👀 Comment below before the next match ends… or I’ll cry.